It's neutral territory. They do other things there. Look--see the mud spraying up? There's a car race going on there.
But let's go over here. See? There's a football game. Only three people playing right now, two white helmets and one red. You better take a red and even things out a bit. There should be another couple of people coming along in a little while.
Now that was an interesting play! It looks like you're going to have to resolve this by a one-on-one. The man from the other team will have the ball, and the woman from your team will have to try to get it away from him.
Oh, for this you'd better remember to detach the dolphin head from the rest of the football. Its shape won't matter, because it looks like she's going to try the domestic approach.
Sit on the folding chairs and watch as he comes in and sits down at the meal she's prepared for him. The poor dolphin head, though. Stroke it--the skin is more slippery than you'd expected, isn't it?--and feel it purr. Well, of course it's not real purring, but a low-frequency whistle. It's still having trouble adjusting to not having its body, but at least this way it can feel useful.
Back to my talk.bizarre page...
The Den of Ubiquity/ Aaron V. Humphrey / firstname.lastname@example.org