Barren the wasteland blooms
Solitary, alone, beauty grows;
Unshed tears, hopes, one rose
Stark bright on harsh arid background
Surrounded by death's decay
The better tomorrow grows.
From the slagheap and detritus
Society's lost souls squabble
Stop to stare, omen and portents
To deep for understanding, wasted
Staggering into liquid walls
Colors run blood empty
Pale gray the day requires fixed.
Unlimited choices available Very rich
Very poor seize, squeeze
Another day out of life while
Another rose grows;
Hopes magnified, bright glory
Bold plucking the dream to watch,
Withering, dieing separate from stem;
Dazed the light burns
Images flash unsequenced future
Preceding history is today
The child plays with man toys
Dreaming of the lost child's innocence

The rose blooms again in my hand
Tears of joy, sorrow, hope
Restoring withered dreams.
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Patience learned
The conceptualized desire exposed
Momentarily to public scrutiny;
Walking life's edge, seeing loves joy
Unattainable, worshiping knowledge and wisdom
Nurse the negative, hold tight to fear
What need for love in empty loneliness?

Soft love whispers, echoing through barren halls
Desperately seeking the divine, the heart wakes
"Give me all" the internal infernal addict cries, "Now!"
The mute found voice, blind seeing sunsets glory,
In one moment pages flooded, whelming minds
Eroding trust, faith lost in needs greedy explosion.

Hands wrapped in summer moonlight
Lust rises to meet desire
Softens beneath the touch
Loving gaze caresses forbidden flesh
Beautiful, sensual, safe and unattainable
Crowned angels queen in the fresh fallen leaves
Crisp frost freezes spiders' webs into beauty
Coffee shared words a touched smile
While the blizzard howls around
Snuggled close, wrapped warm in love
Watching heaven float down
To showers of hope, springs first flower
Beauty to beauty, the gift proffered
Bending the knee, outstretched heart
The echoing three words of forever
Need, want, love
Patience learned to late perhaps
To wait in silent acceptance for what comes
Or not.
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Worshipping violence
Worshipping violence
Another drunk pukes up the dark;
Sidewalk warriors celebrate
Another successful night,
Scream the joy filled rage
Fist beat the night's hate
Anger the rallying cry
Broken glass, blood, and bone
Mark ignominy's spot
Halos of red and blue
Flash flicker on walls of brick and
Cement reflecting civilizations decay;
Brother hates and another dies
Taking hope and making dreams empty
Brief blurb, a family weeps
Another point, news media celebrates
Pain and sorrow entertain while
Horror lies in a box, another
Contemplates anger, bars containing sorrow
Regret, lost dreams clump on box lids
Tears bid farewell to another sacrifice
To the god of violence.
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Smoke darkened whiskey sour rasp
Sensual whisper tugs at the youth,
Come taste maturity, forbidden desires
Be the dream, adult, brave, thin, cool;
Believing the lie, excitement braves the damage
Sick, coughing warning, the body rebels;
With horror the psyche tortures lungs
Persisting in practice, another addict
Steps into life's denial.

Awareness grows, the price paid in damage
Fading health denied while from the shoulder
Whispers of weakness, tomorrows, and fear
Continue to love the hated
Perpetual lies of impotence
What strength to quit when lacking the desire
Another excuse lights the match
Wanting, fearing, desiring, trying
Another failure chalked to irresolution
Forever, chained to the pack
Hope lost to the haze of fear
The addict within denies another year.

Always crumbling in time
Like sandcastles at high tide
The walls of resolve
Fade before addictions tsunami
Searching a click finds an answer
Support, others battle the same hag
Cackling she flees, alone hers is the strength
Isolation fades, tear obscured monitor
Let me hold your hand, share your strength

Holding on to watch sorrows slip
Ecstatic year long quits celebrate
Hell week completed finally
Joy supports the struggling
Weak stragglers buoyed by a kindness
Flames burn unchecked while love
One post below, enmity forgotten
Easy quits hard
One tries a hundred
First time, last time, only time
All quit together online
Extraordinary people in café's
Climbing mountains, frying fish
Roses of beauty, a pledge
Just another web site
But for the people
For the first time, time passes
Smoke free, cigarettes unburnt rot
In stores money unspent on death
Is spent on small pleasures
Life slowly regains the clarity
Lost to the first smoke< Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Happy Birthday
It began the first memory mutual
Knowledge, kindness, caring shaped
My futures promise your unconditional
Help, support, generous spirit
Neither love nor blood this bond
But friends, shared memories
Childs pain and joy a mans comfort

Irritating, provoking, warped humor
Jealously protecting shared moments
My bedrock, my solid support
The foundation of my soul
The world crumbles and I turn to look
You stand strong, tall, beautiful

Baker of mud pies, reading instructor
Sharer of the secret desire
Sympathetic ear, soft shoulder
The sister that my heart holds dear

On your birthday, I wish only one thing
May the love you give me return
Rich, deep, joyous
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Fresh the breeze rekindles
Fresh the breeze rekindles
Memories of summers yet to be
The dream talks softly
Shared with confident trust

A dragon follows a unicorn
Through meadows green
While elephants dance with mice
On marbled halls filled with mirth
Sun dyed clouds grow the dream
Childs eyes see the beauty
Lost in offices cold and dreary
Remember the simple joy
Love deep pure clean untarnished
The frog released to freedom
Another summer day bright and buoyant
Celebrate the child within for a moment
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Forgetting to think
Forgetting to think
I sat captivated, staring
What prison this that holds
Spell bound the heart
Walking the moons path
Springs lust modified sensibility
Magical the elf cast the spell
Moonbeams chase twinkling stars
Eyes smile bright forever's love
Willows whisper to the breeze
No key but one held in your heart
Free now, but less so, memories
Sweet, fragrant, desire
Had I thought to speak
Such words of wisdom's fancy
Flowing, thrilling, engaging
Lips sealed by a thought of a kiss
I think too late now.
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

I rise in the in-between time
After the late revellers return
Before the cocks first crow wakes the morn
I listen to the sleeping stillness
Clocks clunk computer fans hum
Calm, the world awaits the change
Listen, in the quiet as soul speaks to heart
Centred, the stillness permeates the day
Stressed and bothered I remember the beginning
Eased to gentleness, I smile peace
No alarm scream to wake the nightmare
Angry day, rush after fading dreams
Slow the start, tender waking to a good day
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Rain Warmth
Wrapped tight in friendships warmth
Like the blanket made of love by
Grandmother, mother, aunt
On a cold stormy night out of
Old discarded clothes, sheets, and memories.
The soft pit pat of rain on the roof
Roaring fire heating the home
The sound and feel of love
Rain wet easy comfort.

Holding on to the smile of shared words
Giving the most precious gift of time
Friends' comfort eases the long hours
The journey becomes a pleasure
Shortened by laughter and life
The little joys are the hidden treasure
Discovered in the sharing of memories
Friend, confidant courage
The needful smile shared
Indefensible folly forgiven,
Wise unheeded advice heard
I pull the warmth of a rainy day close
Luxuriate in the lazy ease of memory
And create anew the joy of friendship

Hand in rain slicked hand we skip
Singing our childhood back
Splashing in exuberant joy
Puddles shrink and grow behind
Cavorting feet, the rebirth of innocence.
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Thank you
Friends listen when we speak the hard words
Friends offer comforts shoulder without reservation
Friends stay up late to hear our complaint
Friends offer a smile when our hearts break
Friend I thank you for all you have given
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Dawn's Promise
Summers early risen heat promise
Soft morning mist shrouds the hidden trees
Sun lifts the harbinger hot humid heat comes
Sing the dawn alive, early morning birds
Cajole late rising dreamers from sleeps comfort
Promised worm induced lethargy
Better, the warmth of loves arms
Wrapped tight in tomorrows hope

Freshly ground and brewed coffee drifts
Rousing the languorous and weary to taste
Windows open on dawn's flower sweet breath
Dew wet earth carried across
Thresholds of past memories
Shared tenderness, the smiling kiss
Soft caress, dawning desire of lasting passion

Bees drone the sound of expectations
With hiss and crackle balloons rise
Gentle flight, silent drifting beauty
Love washed clear dawns cloudless sky
Faithful optimism following dreams
The day begins in beauty, possibility, promise.
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

I look at my sink
See the piled dishes and wonder
Wonder why no-one will do them for me
Wonder when self washing dishes will be invented.

The sink smirks sated full replete
Mocks the lazy and lax with work
Wash me laugh the encrusted forks
Tinkling madly arguing with spattered spoons
Plates glued in lusty exchange to saucers
Alone a plastic cup swims seeking safety
Frying pans frolic in expected freedom

I look at my sink
The pile grows pregnant with expectation
Each day larger, higher
Wonder becomes awe lost in the search
The clean knife lies at the base
Unwashed wonder fades to hunger
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

I see her beauty
Her smile transfigured
Lighting the world
Hope, love, lust, comfort
The future looked so different
Shiny, filled with warmth and optimism
Now bleak barren empty unchanged
The empty cold bed still mocks
The lonely
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

The Beloved Storm
A storm rises to greet the day
A smile sets order in chaos and disarray
Warm tight hugs and wet chocolate kisses
Lightning quick the flashing questions
Question to question, thought to thought
Thunder cries eased by mothers healing touch
The day passes in a flurry of joys pursuit
Across hot savannas screaming through
Flash flood, water falls hidden magic tunnels
Back flopped, a brief rainbow moment
Building clouds of dreams in sunny skies
The day ends with spent and pleasant memories
Prayers of innocent love, a mother hugs
Smiles kissing sleeping brow
Tight tucked treasured storm
Sleeps safe to greet another dawn
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Silent and inattentive staring
Transfixed by burning midday sun
Dragonflies chase a season's growth
Ants bring home tall tales;
What beneficial and capricious gods
People their earth to feed and kill
Unknowing and uncaring on a whim.
Staring back at the bleached and bleak bones
Past stares forward in shimmering heat
Death haunted footsteps wither hope
The dead red rose blooms on blackened vine
Bloodied selfish hand torn by soft dull thorn.
Pressing forward, ever forward death paces life
Devastation pleasant and sweet grows
Behind deaths desert blooms silent
Ahead life's garden dies horror filled screams

Pain teaches the lesson not learned
Wisdom grows with each tear shed
Knowledge is gained with life
The lost hope
The forgotten hope
Storm crests on blood red skies
The bolt misses and sin continues
Rain washes horrors blood in polluted
Streams to rivers, filling oceans with death
Laugh to casual entertainment
Fill an hour with small conversations
Speak with the hubris that leaves no guilt
Words remove culpability no need for action
The child cries for inheritances ruin
Death silently strolls soft steps through life
All surveyed belong to this spectre
The nightmare that holds no warm hope of love
The necessary curse of existence's bane

The sun shines the tale of hope
Another day brings another story
All ends and beginnings the same
The joy lies in the living life between
Love's smile on babies innocence
First bloom of love in unbroken hearts
The tender kiss of old loves rejoined
An afternoon shared in teasing sibling love
The kind hand, sweet smile, gentle word
To the wayward and street lost
Remembering our culpability we forgive sin
Looking back on the pasts beached bones
Stepping forward, ever forward into life
Death follows one step behind.
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

The dream crumbles
The dream crumbles with my touch
Midas was lucky with retained wealth
I hold neither gold nor hope in empty hands
Only empty impressions of dreams long past
With a whispered plea I reach out
Don't I cry to another dreams fatality
Words gave life and death
Consumed by helpless passion
I spoke desperations final plea
Tarred with hates brush egged on by faith
I touched with cursed hand
To watch another dreams demise
The loss of hopes and love
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Warm wet possibility unfolds
With a word of unspoken desire
The soft light of love limns the world

Truth hurts the wielder
With bloodied hands push
Tear stained truth deep and pray
Forgiveness comes some day

Kindness the unkind action
Love holds locked bars tight
Ensuring freedom never occurs

Should I push you away forever
Kind loving caring words
Should I send you deep within
Hard cold hating words
Should I speak the truth
Bitter medicinal wept words

One word opened the door
Ink floods tear stained page with hearts blood
Faster the flow than pen writes
Smoke rises before match is struck
My souls mirror wakes forgotten desire
Intimately aging flesh on flesh
Too late to turn back
Too early to charge ahead
Cold empty neatly made bed
Mocks futures hope for warmth
One word lifts exposes hides traps
I turn from want to need
Hope to desired knowing
I forget the future ignore the present
Dwell on the pasts hope for tomorrow
Grasshopper fades to chick-a-dee
Sweet love songs ring out the dawn
Enticing words of lusts completion
Unending bliss begins holding honor hostage
Heart held in open hands
Gifts return refused in silent rejection
What was freely given cannot be freely returned
One word made me more

Friends and sisters conspire
With ex-lovers to tie
Unacceptable closer to life
Easing pain deeper with
Words of kind cold loving hate
Wrapping the nightmares comfort
Close to the children of hope
One word push deep with blood red hands
Tears cut deeply as I alienate
Love and friends with truth
Kindness kills gently the unsaved
That miracles occur is
Proven by friends existence
I believe

Better to protect our own heart
Then speak plain freeing truth
Hiding behind kindness our spite
Confessing to love we fear change
Free we may lose what was never held
Love like hate absolves responsibility
Dejected rejected forgotten
The truth dies battered bloodied bruised
Neglected beneath the weight of kind loving caring words
Love lost to truths harshness
I pray to see freedom shine
In the light of beauties eyes
I weep at the silent words
Pushing the tear stained truth deeper
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

I pace

Pacing perimeters of personal existence
With a word, you change darkness to light
Hopes fantasy replaces imagined fear
I pace thought to thought
Wishing each step were one closer
I try to leave the well-beaten path
Self doubt, recrimination, unmet expectations
I pace out another day
Sore and aching feet ease sore and aching heart
Yearned for longing lost in logged miles
I pace
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001


Yearning for the forgotten forbidden
Knowledge knaws at wisdoms roots
Silence the unasked questions reply
Choosing the nightmares reality in inactivity
Passing the unbroken cycle teaching
Unacceptability's acceptability in acquiescence
Accepting another excuse for denial
No excuses the excuse to hide in the comfort of fear
Fearing choices consequences, we choose
Passing the guilt to another generation
The past becomes the futures problem
The children pay the parents price.

Alcoved rusty knight squeaks from the corner
Chivalries champion failed another responsibility
Unheeded wisdom amuses the painfully aware
Caustic cruel wit corrodes belief in love
The unbreakable lance that breaks
Before striking first target
Forgetting he too made a choice
In silence accepting and making acceptable
His silent consent incited the crime

The forbidden love holds the heart tight
The painful grasp words empty agony
I stare at what cannot be mine
And desire it
Anguish becomes times filler
Each second pain sinks deeper
Begging for release I hurt love
And find guilt's temporary comfort
Waking to the moment I rise
Quicksilver, pain deadened eyes
Another choice made
Future's plans reflect the past
Unheeded the warning mocks
Realities desire no change in horror
Filled moments passed in brief pleasure
This price I pay and pass not
To futures child

Who am I
If I am not
Who I was

Can you tell me?
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

summer sweet

The smells of summer sweet
Fresh cut grass, lilacs in a glass
Wet dog fur pulls in the rain-dampened earth
Wild strawberries lingers underfoot
The erotic odor of an approaching storm
Pushes the pines scent free
Rising youthful summers memory
Fresh mown hay, horse sweat
Blueberries and wet sand
Layers of bug repellent lathered on thick
Clover sweet fresh honey
On home baked breads freshly buttered heat
Pond scum mingles with captured frog in the pocket
The sweating forest pants in midday heat
Earth rich loam rises from foots fall
Freshly climbed spruce gum glues fingers tight
Watermelon wet seed spitting fight
The wonderful odors of summer
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Hopes Words

With hopes words
I imagined the future
Sun sets on locked fingers
No one touch orgasmic ecstasy
Hours spent exploring intimacy
Through years of familiarity no contempt
Each wrinkle, each crevice as exciting today
As hormone driven youths desire
From toe to brow, each touch
Creates raging lust love rises anew
The whispered words in crowded rooms
The secret touch in full view
Eyes cross, lock, lust blooms in love's smile
Though in walkers we walk
Down halls of memories
Along rivers banks and lake shores
Ocean waves break on moonlight nudity
Years spent teaching learning
Pleasure given and received in smiles
A shared life holding no secrets, only mystery undiscovered
Each new moment rediscovering desires
Flesh to flesh, breath to breath, soul lovers
We cling to today the way we did yesterday
And walk wrinkled and gray into the future
Arms clasped in intimate embrace
Should love and lust be restricted to youthful fervor alone?
I pray not as I look in your eyes
I remember the words of hope
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001


The sky's blue clarity
The eternal souls window
Made me stop, consider
Misguided preconceived misconceptions
Am I really me or another?
Do you see my truth
Is my self-belief a lie
Is there truth in the lie
Or is the lie the truth
The calm water reflects the sky
Blue on blue, but different.

Across the skies heat haze
Dust clouds linger
Diesel disgust burns
Burns the green black
Fresh mown lost to exhaust
Flower scent fades, faint remembrance
Fantasy of youthful summer morn
Lost to progresses approaching age

You thought you had the right to be wrong
The freedom to speak of peace
The peace to speak your mind
So you spoke of hate and crime
Loving violence and harm
You will wake one day
To the world dark and gray
Unable to speak to the right
This hate filled place
The dream you created
The world you made.

Each word carries history
Each meaning unique to place
One language divides and separates culturally
In our differences we are the same
Love grows where once was hate
We hide weakness with words
Afraid to show the world
We too are only human.
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001


The silent stillness of dawn
Is eased by the robins cry
Wake the sun, the day has begun
The moon confused lingers to tease
Lovers linger still bathed in her embrace
Another week finishes as it began
Quiet, still with hope

The lost dreamer stands forlorn
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001

Sorrow's Farewell

We shared a moment beneath the willows shelter
In passions embrace we spoke of past and promised future
Life's distractions intruded rudely on the dream
You went your way to begin in silence the work
We needed to see the promised reality.

I had not the strength, nor armor, nor courage
Neither knight nor angel, only a trembling child
Unable to rescue the princess in the tower

But no

I will not be your candle
Windows faint forlorn hope
Holding you captive to your past
I will not be your friend offering
Comfort, pity, empty words of hope
Ensuring you remain abuses captive
I will not be your enemy hated
(Though perhaps too late for that)
Offering cold hard harsh hateful and false words
I offer my eyes should you have the courage
Look within see the truth
A good woman in horrible situation
Two choices, which will you take
Life with joy and pain, more joy we pray
Or Nightmares cycle unbroken
Passed from the past
Into tomorrows future
There is no in-between
But, please I beg
No more silent lies
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001


Comparing myself to others
The whip scored and scared back
To imagined slights and slurs
I strike again and compare
Screamed against empty silent uncaring walls.

Acceptance is difficult
Acceptance is hard
The deformed, crippled, haggard soul
Hides within fear afraid to look
Loves mirror unfaced I flee
Back to conformity and anonymity
Neither saint nor sinner
Just another ordinary man
But who wants to be ordinary?
Copyright @M.Lingrell2001