Battle Report: April 29, 2002
Opponent: Skaven
Army Size: 1500 Points
Result: Defeat (Massacre for Skaven)

Hopefully this will stand for some time as the most crushing defeat I've been handed. This was admittedly a list I threw together mainly out of curiosity, but my opponent had a very similar format (ungodly numbers of Plague Monks) and utterly thrashed me with it. Besides the usual troubles with animosity (this in spite of what will be my final attempt to field Black Orcs), I had the worst dice rolls imaginable. There were so many 1s and 2s when rolling to hit and wound, you'd have sworn there were no other numbers of the dice. And then of course I rolled nothing but 5s and 6s for leadership tests. Go figure. The basic idea behind this army design was to boost the number of attacks, but I think I inflicted the least damage in my brief history as a general on account of all the bad rolls!

I did have some luck with magic. Rather fortuitously, both of my Shamans managed to acquire my favorite spell, the Fists of Gork. One Shaman was also equipped with Ditto's Double-Doin Doo-Dahs, allowing me to cast the spell a grand total of three times each magic phase. This would undoubtedly have been more effective if my units had spent less time fleeing, but the one turn I managed two successful castings against a single block of Clanrats was definitely a high point of the battle. After spending a fair span of time fielding magic-light armies, I've been reminded that Waaagh! magic is an exceptionally powerful offensive tool. Perhaps I should condider fielding two Shamans on a regular basis.

Despite the rather crushing defeat, I'm still convinced that the principle of loading up on troops with spears, dual hand weapons and frenzy is a sound one. I tend to play a very offensive style, and this seems like the optimal way to get the best results. What I need to work on a bit more is supporting units. I've become somewhat disillusioned with Boar Boyz, as I haven't had much success with them of late. A unit smaller than 10 can't really make a frontal charge against anything but the weakest of enemy units, and they seem a bit on the expensive side to field purely as a flanking unit. Frenzy is also a tremendous liability, but I don't think basic Boar Boyz have enough attacks to pack a serious punch. I'll have to either reconsider my tactics or drop Boar Boyz altogether.

This losing business is definitely becoming tiresome - my winning percentage now stands at an utterly pathetic 25%. It seems that no matter what units I choose and what tactics I employ, I have no control over the effectiveness or reliability of my army. The only reasonable conclusion I can come to is that I'm somehow not using the troops properly, meaning I'm not playing them the way the designers meant them to be played. If Greenskins were really as balanced as they're made out to be, it'd be possible to use them effectively in more than one way! Unfortunately, I'm not willing to assemble blocks of 30 Orcs and 50 Goblins. The units I have now are already larger than I'd really like them to be, but it seems I still haven't bought enough to sufficiently appease the Warhammer gods.

Considering the amount of time and effort I've invested in collecting and painting this army, I'm not going to abandon it now. I've also come to the realization that winning with what I'm willing to buy is going to be difficult at best. So, all I can really do is have as much fun as possible with the army I have. To that end, I'm going to retouch and convert some of my existing units slightly to better reflect my playing style and interests. This will mainly involve turning most of my Orc Boyz into Savage Orc Boyz (I do love frenzy) by covering up as much metal as possible. They won't look anything like the actual Savage Orc figures, but with a bit of effort and creativity, I'm sure I can create a unique set of models. I'm also going to try to work in some goofier units wherever possible. I've had a lot of fun with Doom Divers and Squigs, both of which have actually proved quite effective against heavily armored opponents. I may take a Giant for a spin at some point as well, as they look almost ridiculously amusing.

Heroes
Number Unit Type Upgrades Subtotal Points Total
1 Savage Orc Big Boss
General - leads Savage Orc Boyz

Drog's Dead 'Ard Armour
75
30
105
1 Savage Orc Shaman
leads Savage Orc Big 'Uns

Level 2 Wizard
Warpaint
Sizzla's Shiny Baubles
67
35
8
35
145
1 Savage Orc Shaman
leads Black Orcs

Level 2 Wizard
Warpaint
Ditto's Double-Doin Doo-Dahs
67
35
8
25
135
Core Units
24 Savage Orc Boyz
Additional Hand Weapons
Warpaint
Boss
Musician
Standard Bearer
144
48
24
13
5
10
244
19 Savage Orc Big 'Uns
Spears
Shields
Warpaint
Musician
Standard Bearer
Nogg's Banner of Butchery
152
38
19
19
5
10
25
268
10 Goblin Wolf Riders
Spears
Shields
Musician
Standard Bearer
100
10
10
6
12
138
Special Units
8 Savage Orc Boar Boyz
Spears
Warpaint
Boss
Musician
Standard Bearer
136
8
24
17
7
14
206
19 Black Orcs
Additional Hand Weapons
Boss
Musician
Standard Bearer
190
38
15
6
12
261
83   1502